In episode 166, “How to Call Out Mistakes”, we discuss strategies on how to help someone when they’ve messed up. Learn how to approach and guide them to a better choice next time, all while maintaining a positive relationship. We begin our book study mini series over Dale Carnegie’s book, “How to Win Friends and Influence People in the Digital Age” in episode 151. Learn how to develop soft skills needed to have a positive impact, lead others well, and help point others to Christ.
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Hear Their Side
PRO TIP: Ask good questions first. In episode 165, we talked about employees (or whomever you influence) as a whole, but today we’re talking about the individual. Yes, we can corporately have rules: love thy neighbor, do unto others, turn your projects in on time, etc… All of these rules and guidelines apply to everyone, and we also need to see that we can incorporate individual points as well (e.g. one person needs to work on email etiquette while another needs to address their active listening skills in meetings).
Learning how to call out mistakes in a productive way is vital to the success of the human (the the relationship). When we face the moment when someone errs, it’s vital we hear what they have to say. Why did they do what they did? Can I see where they’re coming from? These are questions to ask yourself as well as the other party. In episode 166, we talk about how to have these conversations, and we give you phrases you can use. Be sure to scroll back up and press play to hear the episode. Here’s a good verse to keep in mind when we need to coach others:
“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”
Matthew 7:3-5
Call Out Mistakes Quietly
PRO TIP: How you address your leaders matters. We’ve discussed hearing their side before making comments, so now we need to be wise in our approach. For example, if you call out the ringleader in the middle of a meeting it can only go one of two ways, and neither are positive for the team. In this episode, we give you a step by step guide on how to navigate these waters once you’ve identified your natural leaders. Here are a few thing to keep in mind:
- lead by example (modeling)
- speak life into others
- coach explicitly
- develop a community approach
Everyone makes mistakes; you’re not Jesus. So, what do we do when this happens with the people we have been placed in charge of? Hear their side, call them out quietly, and respond with grace. Yes, there’s a time and place to fire people when you have to, but this is for every other mistake (we talk about this on the show). Coach them up in a way they feel confident in their next steps. We go over a few examples in podcast episode, so please take a listen at the top of this page. Big takeaway is: help your people learn to fail forward.
Your People Matter
Back to asking good questions. We address this topic in a different light. This time, we want you to ask questions in order to gain feedback or insight to what’s going behind the scenes. Are they stressed or disgruntled? Do they have unknown needs? Asking open ended questions will help you get these answers.
Once you’ve understood their needs, you can begin to ask about their goals. See how you can dovetail these needs and goals to that of your company (or household or friend group, whoever you influence). Take the necessary steps to meet them where they are on this path, and provide what you can in order to help them reach their goals. This is where you can add in how to grow, specifics you need from them that will help them meet the team goals, etc. Give creative freedom where you can.
We hope you enjoyed episode 166, “How to Call Out Mistakes” and that you have practical, actionable steps you can take. Be sure to check out this entire How to Win Friends mini series about how to have a positive impact, lead others well, and help point others to Christ. You can do this! We’re here to help. Click the affiliate image below to get your copy of Dale Carnegies’ book.
